Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Witness: The Living Martyr

Okay, okay... you think I'm going to talk about people who live like victims. Nope. How about, instead of having you guess what I'm going to say, I just tell you? Isn't that just a great idea?
I thought you'd think so. Well, I suppose I could start out by telling you that the martyr thought did cross my mind when I wished I could die. But, I must say, that's not really martyrdom. That's just wanting to escape pain and hoping that death would bring relief. Been there, done that. Well, obviously I didn't complete the process or I wouldn't be here right now. Anyway. We were talking about martyrs.

I always thought a true martyr was someone who died for their faith. Did you know that the Greek word for martyr is actually, "witness"? Yeah. Witness. Technically and originally, the process of bearing witness was not intended to lead to the death of a person, although that was oftentimes the result. As time passed and more and more people died for their faith, the word "martyr" was equated with a person who endured suffering and/or death on account of the witness they held for their religious belief.

But think about it. In the original Greek form, the word simply meant: Witness. My question for myself and for you is, "Are we martyrs, right now?" "Are we witnesses for our faith?" We can be, but do we choose to be a...

Witness: A Living Martyr

Monday, October 4, 2010

Action or Reaction?

A few days ago, we were talking about reaction. I asked you to think about what that might be for you. Some people react by drinking, doing drugs or acting out in some other negative way. For me, I realized my "reaction" took a different form. Repression of my emotions and withdrawal from the world were two of my reactions. For the most part I was not even aware that I was doing that.

So I have a question. As a Christian, aren't I a new creation in Christ? Of course. That doesn't mean that I am no longer affected by sin in this world. We all are, whether we want to believe it or not.

So. Life happens. We react. What next? Well, first we acknowledge that we reacted in the first place and understand what form that reaction took. Hey, if you can do that... you've won half the battle. But what about the other half?

Let's recap. Life happens. We react. We acknowledge that reaction. According to Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr.John Townsend, in their book "Boundaries"... once you have acknowledged that reaction, you are freed up to be pro-active. At last your actions can become positive.

Reactive victims are known for their negative view of themselves and others—they complain that others are against them or have taken away their rights. Proactive people don't demand rights, they live them, but they communicate their needs and desires with love and faith. The ultimate expression of power is love; it is not the ability to express power, but to choose to restrain it.

Your action as a proactive person results in the ability to love others as yourself...to be able to die to self and not return evil for evil. In this state of mind I no longer live negatively, reacting to life as a victim.

Will it come back? Most likely. But now it is easier for me to identify when I am "reacting". And what do we prefer?

Action or Reaction?

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Way Out!

I saw this a while ago and thought I would hold onto it. Thought it was thought provoking. What do you think?

Philosophy says: THINK your way out;
Indulgence says: DRINK your way out;
Science says: INVENT your way out;
Industry says: WORK your way out;
Communism says: STRIKE your way out;
Fascism says: BLUFF your way out;
Militarism says: FIGHT your way out;
The world says: ENTERTAIN your way out;
 
But Christ says: I AM the way out!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

What's Your Reaction Action?

The other day I was talking with a bunch of people about the importance of the "reaction stage". Huh? So, what's that? Bottom-line, it is usually seen as a time in a persons life when they "explode". Pent up anger or some type of negative emotion finally decides to "unpent". The person may release their rage through drugs, alcohol, or acting out in some negative fashion.

I was pensive as I sank deep into my chair and contemplated my growing up years. Why hadn't I experienced this "reactive" stage that is supposed to be so typical and even somewhat necessary in the normal development of a person that has experienced an accumulation of past difficulties? Was there something wrong with me? (BTW, those are the kind of thoughts that I plague myself with many a day... which must be one reason why I long for sleep). So, back to the question. Am I normal? Why didn't I have a reactive stage?

Then, not one... but two light bulbs went off in my head. Wanna know what hit me like a lightning bolt? I didn't have one reaction - I had two. My first realization was when it dawned on me that withdrawal from the world is a reaction. Call it silence or passive aggressive behavior. But yes, my reaction was to refrain from action. To withdraw from a world that had hurt me. I repressed all my emotions at an early age. Withdrawal and repression formed my first reaction. It could be yours, too.

Second revelation... or reaction. I realized that when I finally began to understand emotions and feel again - my emotions exploded and ruled my every action. Do emotions rule your actions as well?

All this to ask you... "What's Your Reaction Action"?

Monday, September 27, 2010

Die-Hard !

I've heard that expression in both positive and negative terms. Positive source: A regiment in the 1800's was actually called the "Die-Hards" because of their resiliency and determination to fight to the bitter end. On the negative side: RE: Public Hangings. A die hard was literally a person who would die reluctantly, resisting to the end.

When it comes to our habits, (and it seems like a significant amount of them are bad), the expression, "Die-Hard" comes to mind. What habits are difficult for you to break? Yeah, sure, there are the obvious things like "it's hard to stop eating sweets" or "watching T.V endlessly"... things like that. But what about habits that are so embedded into our pysche that to rid ourselves of them seems virtually impossible?

Take me, for example. I have a lot of mindsets that need major adjustments. I could list them all but for the sake of time, I will limit it to one negative mindset that I want to kill, but is dying reluctantly, resisting to the end. What is it? I continue to allow myself to be run by my feelings. Oh? You don't think that's bad? Think again. When every little emotion attempts to dictate all your actions... that's something that's gotta go. But it is a die-hard. A die-hard I don't appreciate.

But guess what? I'm also a die-hard... and maybe you are too! The question is, "Who is going to die first... me or my bad habits?"

I'm shooting for the "Die Hard" regiment. What about you?

In God We Trust (All others we Polygraph)

Okay, I realize that two thoughts might be going through your head right now. 1)"True", you say as you chuckle. 2) Is this person trying to say that we shouldn't ever trust anyone? Is that really Christian?

Well, please feel free to jump in and correct me if you think I'm wrong, but a thought struck me the other night that was quite a revelation for me. It may be a no-brainer for you... as a matter of fact, I hope it is. You see, for my whole life I have loved people. Nothing wrong with that, right? Right. But more often than not, I tended to equate love with trust. In my backward thinking, I assumed that if I didn't trust someone then it would be an indication that I didn't really love them either. It hit me like a lightening bolt when I realized that to love people doesn't mean I have to blindly trust them at all times. As a matter of fact, to trust somebody implicitly could be a much larger burden on them than they want to carry.

Nevertheless, it is still a new awareness for me...the fact that I can't necessarily trust people but I can trust God at all times. I guess I really always knew it. I mean, when things started really getting difficult in my life, I did put my trust in God alone. He was the only one I could really depend on. He wasn't and isn't bound by time and trials that can mess with a person's head. People are wonderful and I love them, but they're just like me... they're people who are not always perfect, make mistakes, have regrets, etc. Bottom line - unfortunately, that means they can't always be trusted. But they can always be loved.

So yes, it's true. "In God We Trust ... All Others We Polygraph"

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Victim or Victor?

Yesterday, when I was talking with my husband about wounds and where they come from, Mike said something that really struck me. "We can choose to be a victim or a victor".
All throughout the night and the next day, those words kept entering my head. Victim or victor? Victim or Victor?

Yes, it's true that the deepest wounds come when we are wounded by the very ones we love. The people we thought we could put our confidence in. Those we trusted. But guess what? If you have ever experienced a wound that was a type of betrayal, know that you are in good company. Let me preface what I am about to say by telling you that in the past several months I have met many, many Christians who were so hurt by their wounds that they receded into a shell and refuse to "come out". If you are one of those people... I want to tell you how sorry I am. I know what it feels like. I really do. It's absolutely devastating beyond any pain that you have known before. I'm also sorry that you won't let anyone have fellowship with you anymore. You will be missed. This may sound harsh, but it is true... you have chosen to be a victim rather that a victor.

When Jesus died, he was wounded and gave up his life for the sake of those He loved - you and I, and He was wounded by those He loved. You and I thought we were alone, didn't we? But we're not. Jesus experienced the worst betrayal any man can know by the very people He loved so dearly. And He knew it was coming.

Because He chose to be a victor, we can live in victory! I say that as if it is an easy thing to do. It isn't. But I had an interesting thought on that very point that I'd love to get your opinion on. Tomorrow. See you then...

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Wounded Warrior

Sigh...those two words, "Wounded Warrior", keep coming to my mind. I don't know about you, but oftentimes things come to my mind that I don't understand. Thoughts swirl around without any apparent direction. So. When they persist and I'm trying to "figure them out", I have to first isolate them. The words "wounded" and "warrior" must be separated temporarily, in order for me to understand. Okay. Let's start with "warrior". What is a warrior? (Hey, you guys, I'm going to give you my eventual thoughts... but I would really like yours as well). What do you think of when you think of a warrior? I think of someone who persists. Is loyal. Is determined. A fighter. The largest battle takes place in the mind, and the true warrior knows that. A warrior has a heart of gold. They fight for what they think is right. A deep love underscores everything they do. They are thoughtful- and mindful of those thoughts.

It occurs to me that there are two types of "Wounded Warriors". Warriors who are willingly wounded for the sake of those they love, and warriors who are wounded by those they love, whether it be individuals or organizations that exists of people. Hmmm...definitely food for thought. Think I'll chew on it awhile and get back to you...

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Model or Role Model?

In this day, it is easy to get consumed with what I call "Model Mentality". People, especially women, frantically want to fit into a "model mode". Alas, most of us don't naturally fit into a size 1... nor do we all have perfect teeth, eyes, hair and weight. The list goes on, right?

It is so easy to focus on the desire to be loved. That is why so many people have the model mentality I mentioned above.

But what about being a role model? Can I? Can you? Of course. Admittedly, the thought of someone looking to me for encouragement and/or support, is a thought that at times fills me with awed wonder. Can I be what others need me to be? I can't even live up to my own standard, much less someone else's!

Then I remember Tim Hansel. I've spoken of him before. I highly recommend you get the book he wrote called, Ya Gotta Keep
Dancin!


In a nutshell, Tim is climbing a Rock and falls several hundred feet directly on to more rock. Nothing broke his fall. An incredibly hard impact that should of killed him is what awaited him. Did he survive and recover? Well, he survived... but he never recovered. For 30 solid years he lived in excruciating pain 7/24... yet he is the man who wrote: Ya Gotta Keep Dancin!

He is a role model that I would like to follow after. Who did he follow after? Who was his role model?

It's worth finding out, don't you think?