Evicted From La-La Land...

Oh dear...I'm afraid I'm going to make some people mad. For any of you that know me from previous articles, you know that I have a hard time saying or doing anything that might offend someone.

I love people - but I love the truth more. So... hang with me, okay?

What is "La La Land", anyway?

L.A.??? As in Los Angeles? ( One dictionary actually gave that as a definition).

Perhaps the people in L.A.? ( Yes, it was literally another definition).

Last, by not least, came the meaning that most people think of when they think of La La Land:

The state of being out of touch with reality.

So far, so good. No hurt feelings, everyone is okay. Now for the clincher:

What is reality?

This is where people get addled.

We get in a lather, become agitated, bewildered, disturbed and even irritated when people don't see things our way, right?

There are three things to consider:

1) Reality
2) Pure Reality
3) Our different worlds.

By "reality" I'm simply referring to the laws and consequences of life in this world alone.

By "pure reality" I mean to speak to people who embrace a spirtual understanding and combine it with the reality of this world. I refer to that as the Spirit -vs- Flesh.

And lastly, everybody lives in their own world which obviously would be different for everyone. Every human being sees and experiences the world around them in light of their own personal and private experiences.

Get it? Got it. Great!

Let me give the defintion of "La La Land" again:

"The state of being out of touch with reality".

Whether you think of reality as the life and consequences of this world, or reality that acknowledges a battle between the flesh and the spirit...we all live in this world. We all deal with life and it's consequences.

Do you ever find yourself in this world, minding your own business, when...BAM! Something hits you between the eyes, figuratively speaking, and stars begin to circle your head? (Okay...maybe I used to watch a lot of cartoons).

Pain - usually emotional pain - enters our world. And I've got to tell you...pain is not always obvious. Ever experienced confusion, anxiety, hurt, fear, agitation? Do you know what it's like to be perplexed, distracted, embarrassed,flustered or perturbed? Ever felt disoriented or unsettled?

Then you have felt pain.

I'm going to take a wild guess here:

I bet you didn't like it.

Chances are, it was a reality that didn't set too well with you. What do we ususally do when we don't like something?

Most of us avoid it. Escape it. Ignore it. Call it what you want, but the bottomline is,at that point we are choosing to ignore reality.

We are entering "La La Land".

You probably didn't like what I said. If you are like me, you might have felt a bit insulted. Perhaps a little defensive. Okay - very defensive.

Honestly, when I mentioned this topic to people before I wrote this post, I was shocked at how defensive and angry they where about this whole subject. They felt it was offensive.

Apparently,nobody wants to acknowledge that "they" are in La La Land, afterall... only irresponsible people live there! To suggest that the average person resides at that location is downright insulting!

Now I'm going throw out something that seems to be in left field.

Life throws us unexpected curveballs, like:

* Being layed off of work
* Finding out you have a debilitating disease
* Having your loved one leave you
* Death
* Demotion at work
* Slander that ruins you
* Pregnancy that you aren't prepared for.

The list is endless.

Is it possible that those things that hurt us, are...in reality:

EVICTING US FROM LA LA LAND???

Dancin On the Line...

I've got a question for you. Do you think, as we go through life, that people make various life choices in the course of their lives- that they are always happy with? More to the point, do you think the decisions that are made are generally good options or do we tend to make bad judgements from time to time? Then again, is it possible that the actions we take in our life are simply "okay" options?

Now that I think about it, we usually don't even think about whether our actions are good or bad - we just do them.

But, when we do decide to be proactive and start actively thinking about the choices we make . . . maybe we are asking ourselves the wrong question.

Instead of asking if our soon to be made decision is right, wrong or okay - maybe we should ask instead;

"Is it WISE"?

Puts things into a new perspective.

Think about it. Lots of things we do are okay.

There is nothing illegal about going out to lunch with a business partner of the opposite sex.

Certainly it is not wrong to dance with that same person at a holiday party? (So you're married...or he is).

What's the harm in being willing to give him a listening ear? (Too bad things are going so poorly with his insensitive wife). It's a good thing you are there for him.

Can you help it if you need him to give you a ride home? Hmmm...he is a lot better looking now that the lights are low and you know his heart. Surely it wouldn't hurt to stop by his house for a cup of coffee before you go home...but things get out of hand.

Days, weeks, months or even years later...you are kicking yourself for your mistakes. 'If only you knew. If only you could go back in time and change things, everything would be different'.

Well, I've got news for you that really isn't news.

You will never be able to go back in time nor will you ever be able to look into the future.

The scenario above was just a scenario - but a very common one. There are thousands of others..but you get the picture.

None of those actions in and of themselves were neccesarily wrong - but they were unwise.

Are you one of the millions of people that has dealt with poor choices in the past or perhaps you are dealing with a circumstance right now that doesn't feel completely right - but you haven't done anything wrong. Not really.

Obviously, you can do whatever you want. Your decisions are yours to make. Many people don't want to say "no" simply because they are too concerned with image. "What will people think of me? They'll think I'm a prude. People will think I'm weird."

Newsflash. This is YOUR life. You have to live with yourself and the decision of your choices every day for the rest of your life. The people you are concerned about aren't going to be living your life for you. So...

If you find you are flirting with danger and skirting the issue, chances are you are:

Dancin On the Line.

AN AVOIDABLE REGRET

It's really weird.  I mean, here we are living our various lives...all of us are very unique, very different.  Billions upon billions of individuals all around the globe.  We reside in different countries and cultures.  Our ethnicity varies from person to person.  Some people are rich, others poor, others in the middle somewhere. In spite of those many differences and more, we all have one thing in common.  One thing unites us.  One thing looms over absolutely every individual who is now alive or who will ever live. One thing is in your future that you will never be able to avoid, no matter how much you try.  Igoring it won't make it go away. We will soon deal with the same thing every one of our ancesters did.

How can I phrase this?  Perhaps the most tactful thing I can say is:  Our days are numbered. Or, for people who need me to be more blunt.  We are all going to die.  No. Seriously.  Don't hit the delete button as you tell yourself that you are not interested in this subject.  What I have to say is something you are going to want to hear.  You have an opportunity right now to push an emotional fast forward button on your life and see into your future.

We all live.  We all die.  Nobody wants to talk about it, but it is reality.  We can't stop death from eventually taking over...but we can make our days of life count.

You see, When you begin to live as if your days are numbered . . . you will gain a heart of wisdom.

It's true.  Think about it.  When you have a deadline to meet, you count your days...rearrange your schedule, prioritize your time in a way that you can accomplish what needs to be taken care of by a particular due date.

You have a due date that is more important, more significant, more compelling and powerful than any other juncture of your life.  Remember when I said earlier that you have an opportunity to do an emotional fast forward on your life?  You will push that fast forward button when you imagine yourself at the end of your life.  When only months or perhaps days, are left, you will look back on your life and why you did things the way you did...

Why did you work so much?  Was it really necessary to spend all those overtime hours so that your kids could live in a bigger house and have their own bedroom?  Did they have to wear only designer jeans?  Was making the money you needed to pay for all those "things" worth missing out on a relationship with your family?  Believe it or not, this is only the second thing that people who are nearing the end of their life, regret.

What is the first thing?  What is the regret that studies have found fill most peoples mind at the end of their lives?

"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."

Regrets.  Life is full of them.  But you and I have the opportunity to learn from other peoples regrets.  Their remorse is so very sad.  It doesn't have to be that way for us.  Why?  Because it is ...

AN AVOIDABLE REGRET.

Willpower or Real Power?

When I hear the phrase "just pull yourself up by your bootstraps" I want to scream. Have you ever felt that way?  Or are you the person that gives that advice to others?

Doesn't matter.  We're all people and we all live in a world that threatens to destroy us in some way at some point.  Everybody has their different "demons" as they say.

You may have a lot of money and/or power.  Problems come with that.  Perhaps you have no money and are alone.  Problems come with that as well.  It seems that nobody is free from potential emotional damage...whether you want to admit it or not.

"Pull yourself up by the bootstraps" as I mentioned above, is a popular phrase.  Or perhaps..."just do it".
Nice and concise.  Too bad it's easier said than done.

I said I don't like those phrases...but why?  I guess it's because those things rely on willpower and that requires energy...and you know what?  That's okay.  For a while. But eventually our energy gets sapped.  We are drained.  Then what?

Rest.  Go on a vacation.  Buy some new clothes.  Remodel.  (Or, for the people who can't afford that at the moment - re-arrange the living room or bedroom).

Being the creative,versatile people that we are, we will think of something.

And then...

We do it all over again.  Live life.  Eventually the problems return and we "pull ourselves up by the bootstraps" just one more time. . . and the cycle continues.

Willpower is amazing.  We have so much more of it than we realize.

We can go on the crazy willpower roller coaster ride for the rest of our lives - with those little breaks in between to keep us going - or we can plug into some real power.

But what is the Real Power and how can we plug into it?

The real power is found in Christ.  When we are connected to Him we can experience real power.  Healing power.  Incredible power.

So what will it be for you?

Willpower or Real Power?

Can Marriage REALLY last???

Well...today is mine and my husbands 33rd year anniversary.  Our marriage started out a little on the unorthodox side.  We actually didn't start dating until AFTER we got married.  I know.  Weird.  Definitely not the norm nor is it what I would typically recommend.  But I WOULD recommend dating each other for the rest of your lives.

Seriously.  It's fun.  It totally enhances your relationship.  Your kids - if you decide you want them - will watch you from a distance and secretly delight in the fact that their mom and dad are still married in this very insecure world.  But... more importantly:

Love each other.

Sounds easy, right?  Wrong!  Yes, loving requires that you love others as much as you love yourself - and that isn't easy.  Well...loving ourselves can be easy - but loving others is certainly not a piece of cake.  Not all the time, anyway.

Truly loving somebody means you will consider their feelings at any given time.  You will want the best for them and do what you can to help in that area.  They come first.

Ideally, this is a two way street.  Both of you will put each other first.

Alas, more often than not, only one spouse invests in the relationship... usually the woman.
Ever wonder why that is?  Pretty simple explanation, actually.

Women are generally more relational.   

So MEN.  Listen up!  This is vitally important!

You are important and I recognize that you have abilities that surpass your counterpart.  But think about this:

If you were to tell you that you had a short time to live...what would you do?  Close your eyes and think about it before you read on.

If you are like the vast majority of the population, you would change your perspective. You wouldn't think to yourself that it is incredibly important to work overtime...you would want to spend "overtime" with your wife and kids.  With people that are important to you.  Relationships are what make human life exceptional.

So, do yourself, your spouse and your kids a favor and:

DATE YOUR WIFE.
SPEND TIME WITH YOUR KIDS
INVESTS IN RELATIONSHIPS THAT ARE TRULY IMPORTANT.

When you do that, you will find that...yes...

Marriage CAN really last!

From Hassle to Hope!

What would you think if I told you that irritating, annoying, frustrating life circumstances that we deal with every day...can actually become amazingly wonderful realities in our lives?

You'd think I was out of my mind.

Well...what if it were true?

You see, when we apply God's promises to everyday situations, those little mundane annoying circumstances will actually become nuggets of hope in our lives.  Those nuggets - those annoying circumstances, chronic difficulties or horrendous struggles, will turn into stepping stones that we can put our weight on until the day comes when we step into our Final Hope - Heaven.

I know.  You are probably furrowing your brow right now as you wonder what in the world I'm talking about.  Stay with me here.

Did you see the movie, "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader"?  Remember the pond that turns everything into gold that is immersed in the water?  The pool of water was found in a cave and the people who discovered it, saw what looked like valuable statues in the pond. Turns out that everything that was dropped into the water - no matter how mundane it was - turned into gold.

That is what happens when we know the Word of God and apply His promises to the everyday circumstances in our lives.  Those painful frustrations actually become potential sources of hope... but only when we apply the truth of God's Word to every situation.

It's as if we "dropped" an exasperating life event into the water...the water being the Word of God...and eventually what was once a frustration becomes gold in the sense that it places you in a position of needing to apply God's word in order to "deal" with the vexing venue you find yourself in.  The gold isn't the situation...we are refined like gold.

No.  It isn't easy and it certainly doesn't come naturally.  It requires that we allow the Holy Spirit to work in our lives as we give ourselves over to Him.  That takes discipline and willingness.  It may happen quickly or it could take more time than we'd like, but...

It can be done.  It IS being done by some.  Do you want to include yourself in that number?

It's time to move . . .

From Hassle to Hope!

A Hope That Satisfies...

You know how sometimes you read or hear about something that sticks with you?  A long time ago, I was reading about a couple of hikers that got lost.  I will call them Becky and Tara.  Nobody knows exactly what happened, but apparently they got lost and eventually separated from each other in hopes that at least one person would find civilization and send help back to the other hiker...if that hiker could be found.

Of course, once separated, each hiker would be on their own and very much alone. They parted ways and made individual attempts at reaching civilization for days. Becky, who was about ready to keel over and sink into oblivion, took a few more steps that took her to the top of a barren hill that she had climbed.  She looked down and spotted a small lake.  It was the first water she had seen in days.  It gave her a hope that renewed her strength with a fervor that propelled her to the life saving watering hole.

She lived.

Days later, a search party found the other hiker about a mile behind where Becky had almost died before she spotted the life giving water.

Tara was dead.

You see, the water that gave Becky hope and propelled her to action, was not in Tara's vision.

I wonder what killed Tara first?  The lack of water or the lack of hope?

So what does this story have to do with me and you?  Sigh...

I will speak for myself.  When I have a lack of hope, I want to die.  Looking around at people surrounding me, I see that I am not alone.  Hopelessness is pervasive and threatens to destroy us.

Proverbs 13:12 says:

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

How can we turn life into longings?  In my next post, I will share with you what I have discovered about how to have ...

A Hope That Satisfies...

One Month to Live

Okay.  I admit it.  I was at someone else's house for a while and found that I needed something to wedge the door open so I could get some fresh air inside.  If I could just find something narrow, as I didn't want a gale of wind pouring through the house.  I small slit would do.  "I know", I thought.    I sauntered over to the bookshelf in search of a suitable doorstop.

I pulled out a book, tried wedging it in the door - but it was a little too wide.  "Rats".  On my way back to the bookshelf to return the unhelpful item, I glanced at the title of the book in my hand.  It caught my attention immediately:


"One Month to Live" by Kerry & Chris Shook.

Wow.  That sounded like something I would be really interested in.  No...I 'm not going to die anytime soon that I am aware of - but still.  Sounded interesting.

I started reading:


"If you only had one month to live, what would you change?"

Hmmm...what would I change?  I continued:

"... By embracing the fact that our time on earth is limited, we can live deliberately, no longer postponing the joy and peace that come from fulfilling our God-given destiny..."


"Your time on earth is limited.  
No matter how much this idea makes you squirm, it's a fact.  No matter who you are, how young or old, what measure of success you've attained, or where you live, mortality remains the great equalizer.  With each tick of the clock, a moment of your life is behind you.  Even as you read this paragraph, seconds passed that you can never regain.  Your days are numbered, and each one that passes is gone forever."


Does this sound morbid?  Perhaps to some people it does.  But the fact remains that it is true.  Turns out this book, "One Month to Live", is not so much about death as it is about life.

Two main points, as I see it:

1)  If you aren't so sure about your eternal destiny, you might be scared away by the very title.  If that is the case, my recommendation is that you read some of my previous blogs.  Take life and death seriously.

2)  If you are certain about where you will go when your physical body reaches it's expiration date, then this book is a keeper.  Why?  Because it is so helpful to look at life with a renewed perspective.  It changes everything...including your heart.

I like to write...but I have to say, it would make me very happy if you would purchase the book, "One Month to Live".  I am not saying that because I would get anything out of it.  The authors don't even know of my existence.  You, however, are important to me - even though I may not know your name or face - and because of that I hope you purchase this book.  It will encourage you and give you the new perspective that you may very well need.

Take care, okay?  Pretend like you only have...

One Month to Live.  

A New Day

I've been gone for a while.  Though I haven't physically left, my heart and mind apparently decided to take a sabbatical without my consent.  Has that ever happened to you? Sometimes circumstances are so incredibly overwhelming that it is all you can do to keep your head above water.

You were very missed by me...but I just didn't have the energy or heart to write.  Things weren't terrible.  Well, yes . . . maybe they were.  Alas, I'm still alive - admittedly "much to my dismay".  I know.  That sounds awful.  But the truth is, sometimes life throws us so many curve balls, all we want to do is get out of the game!

It's okay though.  No.  It's good.  We all have such very strong wills.  But I, speaking for myself, want to let God's Will for my life be preeminent.  Problem is, following God is both incredibly easy and supremely difficult at the same time.

Why is that so?

Bottom line... the main thing God wants us to be is - loving.  Yes, there are hundreds of "commands" that God used to require - back in the "Old Testament" days.  But when He sent His Son, Jesus Christ...to die for our sins thereby becoming a sacrifice for us - if we choose to believe in Him - things became both more simple and more difficult.


How so?

More simple because the only real command that God wants His children  to follow is:

Love.  Love yourself and your neighbors.

Oh.  And did I mention that He wants us to love our enemies?  To love people that are "unlovable" is not easy.  But maybe you've "got it down". Ask yourself this question.   Do you love those people who are difficult to love - all the time?  Does God only want us to "love" when we're "up to it"?

So how do we do it?  How do we let love permeate our lives and lifestyle so that it touches everybody we come in contact with?

I'll tell you one thing for certain - it isn't going to be easy... and it isn't natural for us.  The only way we can love with that kind of love is to let God love people through us.  The only way that will happen is if we die to ourselves - our own self wills.  But wait.  Doesn't God want us to be unique?  Isn't that how He created us?

Yes.

The thing is, submitting to God does not mean we become a bunch of robots without the unique identity that God created us to have.

Okay, I'm going to say something that many of you may disagree with vehemently.

We can't submit our wills to God for very long of our own accord.  That's the hard part.  We need to submit to God.  Only He knows us so completely that He knows exactly how to help us be the people both He and we want to be.

God may even allow crushing circumstances into our lives so that we can know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that we can't live in our own strength.  I know.  That sounds terribly cruel.  But the fact is, it's the only thing that He can do to enable us to die to our own strong self-will that gets us into trouble.  But...

The closer we come to letting God's Will become our own, the sooner we will have...

A New Day
   

A Stumbling Block or Stepping Stone?

Many of you know who I'm talking about when I mention John the Baptist.  But for those of you who don't... let me give you a quick run down:

John was Jesus's cousin.  He told people that soon, the Son of God would be on the scene.  Basically, he prepared the way for Christ... but I don't know how prepared he was for his own precarious future!  You see, in a nutshell, John was letting people know that King Herod had an affair and married his brothers wife, Herodias (after she divorced King Herod's brother).  That didn't set too well with the King and was especially embarrassing for his new wife, Herodias.

It's not a pretty picture and it doesn't end well for John.  The beginning of John's most difficult trial began when he was thrown into prison.

So why did I remind you of this historical fact?  What does it have to do with the here and now?

Keep reading.

Imagine what you would feel like if you were in John's position. There you sit.  The man who proclaimed to the world that the Son of God was coming.  Jesus comes.  Heals people left and right.Casts out demons.  Miracles have become a daily occurrence...and there you sit in a dark, musty, dungeon at the mercy of a King who was known for his cruelty.  What would you think?  How would you be feeling?  Could it be that you would begin to wonder about this "Son of God" named Jesus?  Seems like He would save the very man that prepared the way for the Messiah!?

So, John's world is now his prison cell.  His pain, his hurts, his confusion ...whatever emotions he may have had...threatened to overwhelm him.  Imagine being left alone in that environment.  His world was no bigger than the dank dungeon he sat in and as time passed, he began to doubt..question...wonder.  "Is Jesus really who He says He is?

Then John asked the disciples who came to visit him if they would ask Jesus if  He really was " the one...or if they should be looking for someone else"?  I mean, supernatural occurrences and amazing wonders had resulted in healings for countless people... what about John?  Where was John's miracle that he so desperately needed?  Didn't Jesus care about him?

The disciples asked Jesus that question.  Know what Jesus said?

Yes, many people are being healed.

 "The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor."  Matthew 11:5

So, John may have thought ... "What about me?"  "What am I - chopped liver?"  (Okay...maybe he didn't say the part about the liver).

But Jesus asked the disciples to tell John one more very important thing. And the message that Jesus wanted John to get - is the same message He wants us to have.

 "Blessed is anyone who does not stumble on account of Me."


What does that mean?  Most versions say something along the lines of:  "Blessed is he who is not offended because of Me."

But in the Greek, the word for "not offended" is a word whose primary meaning has to do with stumbling.
That is why I like the version:

Blessed is anyone who does not stumble on account of Me.

What an awesome thing to say...Jesus is acknowledging in those few words, that life is going to be different for everyone.  The way God chooses to work will be unique to each individual.  Some people will experience His miraculous works in one way, others will experience His miraculous grace in a whole different light.  But people, being people, will compare.  "Hey, God did this for so and so... why isn't He doing the same thing for me?"

Because God loves the entire world, full of people who are unique and varied.  Everybody responds differently to God's work and consequently God needs to work differently in peoples lives.  He sees the big picture.  We don't.

That is why it is so important that we listen to the last message John received from Christ.

"Blessed is ANYONE who does not stumble on account of ME."

It's true that many people get disgruntled with Jesus when He doesn't do things the way they think He ought to. Fortunately, there are other people who think differently. The question can be asked. Is Jesus...

A Stumbling Block or Stepping Stone?